It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Everything seems to slow down, and one of the greatest gifts of the season is centered - our intentional use of time. As many of us take respite from our normal work schedules and turn up the volume on time with loved ones and friends, there’s one ingredient that can truly nourish your children and family—and it’s free: quality time.

While our regularly scheduled programs slow down, our social calendars fill up like Santa’s sleigh.  Every shared laugh and story during the holidays warms our hearts like hot cocoa after a fresh snowfall.  We begin adding parties and events to our weeknights and weekends, as quickly as we add gifts under the tree. In the midst of the fun of winter festivals, ugly sweater contests, and gingerbread making parties, it is important to note that quality time, intentional, focused, and meaningful time spent with family and friends is all of the holiday magic you need.  

Quality time with family and friends, where attention is undivided and interactions are genuine, has a positive impact on your children. Think of this quality time like a warm cup of soup—comforting, nourishing, and strengthening from the inside out. When you spend focused, intentional moments with loved ones, you’re not just passing the time—you’re filling your children’s hearts with security, building confidence, and helping them grow into resilient, happy individuals.

For many Americans, quality time with family is considered the most important aspect of life. Anchoring many of us, who may otherwise be lost in a computerized world, with shared experiences and traditions. 

What are the benefits of quality time?

First and foremost, quality time creates a sense of belonging. Children thrive when they feel seen, valued, and connected.  Genuine, meaningful connection creates emotional safety, and shows your child (children) they have people who care about them, like and accept them, cheer for them, and enjoy spending time with them. Laying the foundation for healthy relationships in the future, when children receive attention and encouragement from the trusted adults in their lives, they internalize a sense of worth and capability.

Secondly, quality time improves social skills and abilities. When kids grow up in a connected environment, they learn how to collaborate, communicate, navigate differences, and build friendships more easily.  Evidence from a Harvard study points to a correlation between the development of a strong vocabulary and language‑processing skills to children whose parents or caregivers provide rich, varied language in infancy and toddlerhood.  Furthermore, valuable conversations and interactions that are a byproduct of quality time, allows kids to practice expressing feelings, hearing guidance, and learning empathy by observing and interacting with attentive adults.  

Lastly, quality time creates lasting memories and traditions. Shared experiences provide emotional anchors that children carry throughout life, fostering a sense of belonging and identity. All of the memories you create this holiday season, from the most mundane to the most magnificent, will make a lasting impression on the hearts and minds of your children for years to come. This years’ memories may even inform the lives of their children.  What could be more merry? 

What are some of the obstacles and challenges with spending quality time?

Two of the most challenging aspects of spending quality time with your children and family is

  1. Finding the time, and 
  2. Finding something to do in that time that everyone will enjoy.  

Here is the thing about quality time - it does not require us to “do the most”.  We must not over complicate it. Try these 2 easy steps:

  1. The first, easiest step would be to put your phone down or turn it on “do not disturb”. 
  2. The second step would be to meet your loved one, your child, where they are.  
    1. Are they watching a holiday movie on the couch? Join them with popcorn.  
    2. Are they doing some homework at the table? Pull up a seat and ask them what they are working on.  
    3. Do you have a holiday task to complete and think they would love to help? Invite them to wrap a present for Grandma, or make cookies for their teacher.  It does not have to be an elaborate, expensive event planned weeks in advance.  

The best quality time is free, and found at home. Creating memories and finding joy in the everyday, routine rhythms of life is a gift.  ‘Tis the season for togetherness, and decking the halls with our loved ones.  Let us all get to know one another better, and intentionally place “quality time” as our number one priority.

Closing Thought

Whether it’s watching a holiday movie together, baking cookies, decorating the tree, or simply sharing stories over hot cocoa and a Santa puzzle, these moments matter. They ground your family, create lasting memories, and provide the emotional nourishment your kids (and you!) need.  To use our soup analogy once more, quality time is like a warm cup of soup—comforting, nourishing, and strengthening us and our children from the inside out so we can step back into the world grounded, supported, and ready to thrive. This season, slow down and savor the moments. Pour yourself a little warmth, share it generously, and watch your family grow stronger—one cozy, meaningful moment at a time.

 

By Vanessa Clinton